Let me start off my letting you know that the local Authority having jurisdiction in your area is the final judge and jury regardless of what the national code states, and every area is different.
1) I believe you are correct about drilling from the edge of the joist, what you can and can’t drill through is more of a local building code thing. Obviously you don’t want to drill in a way that could structurally damage your home.
2) I can’t remember off hand if the 2008 code allows you to tap off with a 14g wire on a 20amp circuit but I don’t think so. My rule of thumb has always been 20amp circuit 12g wire.
3) You are right about the AFCI and GFCI protection in the 2008 code, if your area has adopted it.
4) The feed for your panels could be done in SCR or pipe, SCR is aluminum so 4/0 would be required. However if you do it in pipe you could use 3/0 copper.
http://www.wireityourself.com/wire_sizes.html5) 2008 NEC 406.11 Tamper-Resistant Receptacles in Dwelling Units.
In all areas specified in 210.52, all 125-volt, 15- and 20-ampere receptacles shall be listed tamper-resistant receptacles.If the 2008 NEC is in effect in your area, yes, the receptacles should be the tamper-resistant types being installed.
Hope it helps!